when the unconcious peeks in the concious

when the unconcious peeks in the concious
Glimpses into eternity

Tuesday 8 April 2014

In the Midst of All- Chapter- One Part one Sunlight and Shadows

              




"The problem with love is that it’s love and can’t be altered or tailor made to suit our needs, times and time. Its relentless, unassuming, all loosing yet all usurping, all consuming, it destroys, breaks, makes  and keeps you guessing till the end"

“This is not how we can compare Romantic tragedies with Classical Tragedies” said Shahin, peeping into the scribble I had written on my seminar paper.

Now this is Shahin eternal nosy in her best avatar! Come on, what is her problem!

"I am doing my papers, all right. I know it’s my turn next I am almost finished and I scribbled some incoherent lines. What’s the big deal in that ! Why to make a fuss out of everything. I never say anything when she talks  the whole night out speaking sweet nothings to her boyfriend while I lay dreaming waking and doing what not." I think aloud but don't gather enough courage to speak out all these to her.
 
”HELLO YOUR TURN NEXT” She tunes into her ‘Oh so Bossy loud Whisper’ mode.
That’s enough of a provocation to make me speak out finally." Oh God! I know that..it’s over, see! I was writing all the while.”
“Yes but were you concentrating?”
“YESSSS” I shout back in Whisper
“Ok as you wish and think” now here’s my submissive girl (no pun intended I guess)
Ok now the moment of truth, my presentation, as I walk towards the Dias I see eyes scrutinizing me trying to guess what is in my mind but these eyes don’t turn me on as those eyes did and will always do but they are making me nervous….
“So Here is Miss Devyani Roy, with her paper hot and fresh straight out of the oven. So good for the health” Miss NJ with her sugar coated sarcastic voice which you love to hear but kind of hate to listen at least now.
 But then love costs even when it’s a dream but then who was it who was there in the end………..I know him but why he? Well let’s quit it and present the paper.

I quit my train of thoughts and present the Paper. 

“Comparison Between Oedipus and Jakarta – Oedipus Rex and Antony-Cleopatra –Antony Cleopatra”

My paper and as I read out aloud I can hear people sniggering. I know an odd subject to speak on but human relations are a bit confusing, aren't they?


“Cleopatra was a woman whose appeal, as believed never lied in her face but in her brains, she manipulated her way to Marc Antony’s heart but then chose to stay there. Their relation was mature but at the same time passionate and passion was what consumed them, their success and everything around but then they were happy to be destroyed may be knowing all the while the outcome bonded them in a lethal bond. But if we see Oedipus an Jakarta share a mature and fulfilled relation they are parents of two children and look after a land but they live the doom everyday without even knowing it, so for one its Knowledge that is bliss but for other ignorance is bliss……..”

God this paper is getting on my nerves wondering how my listeners are even liking it………………..

………….Oedipus the man who made that land fertile again in which he was sown. Anger is bad. It drastically changes your life in a moment's notice sometimes and sometimes knowledge is the poison which ignorance was saving you from.

What  would have happened if Oedipus never knew the truth? The plague would have ended and he would have reigned on. He would have reigned on with his wife. Not knowing the entire life that his children were his brother and sister and his wife was also his mother. Was it for him he had to know or it was for the world to be warned?  But then tragedies are made to warn us, to ward off our inner demons before they devour us but what’s  so wrong if we enjoy being devoured. We enjoy being destroyed, ravaged. What if pain soothes us?
“Excellent write up Devyani Roy” Rathore Sir, the first to criticize the last to praise; the perfect teacher.

Today his words brought me out of my trance. Turns out I had given my paper well and I could feel it but I can’t recall……..my brain was working hard at it while my soul was somewhere else, talking to my mind. I felt lost……….maybe forever……………..

To be Continued............

For Chapter Zero, Prologue



Photo Credits: Datta Ghosh.

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